Day 365: Starting Over

525,600 minutes.
525,000 moments so dear.
525,600 minutes.
How do you measure,
measure a year?
-Rent

If you've ever seen the musical Rent, you know the Seasons of Love song. With just a few simple words, it captures the struggle we all have: to experience joy and pain and treasure it all equally.

This past year has been like that.  365 days of inches, miles, laughter, and strife.

So many nights, I thought I was going to die.
So many blessings...created from misery.

There are no words to describe what it's like to cry out, night after night, drowning in the dark.
Or, how much you appreciate an "ordinary day," once it's escaped you.

I can't express it now, but I hope these 365  (or so) posts somehow did.

I'm grateful for that AND for you.

Thanks for listening.

 Here's to what's next.

Altered Today: Peace, Completion

Comments

[Jenny Rush]

Love your posts. I dealt with Lyme for years, this year was the toughest...also the best. This year I learned to 'be'. I spent months on the couch staring at the ceiling, unable to do much and unable to think much (brain mush and fog). And in the quiet of 'being', I experienced all of my life, the oneness that we are, the pain I had hidden, the joy I hadn't appreciated. I forgave my being a victim and found empowerment in being responsible for my unwellness. I made peace with dying and began to live. Lyme has been my access to a fulfilled life. Who knew!!!

Here's to the year ahead. With you all the way. xoxo

[Alter Everything]

Thanks, Jenny. And congrats on the new blog!! Learning to 'be' inside of illness...that really is the game. Looking forward to spending more time with you and making a difference for us and for others. Keep thriving. :)

[Renee]

Beautiful quotes here. I have not been coming here long, but have enjoyed my visits! Congrats on your one year and the wisdom you have drawn from it is amazing abd encouraging.

[Kathy Sheridan]

I have been following you since I found you on etsy and you made me the altered book video. I have been a silen follower but have checked in each day to see how you were doing. I have come to know you, which seems a bit creepy probably because you do not really know me at all. And I have to say, I have also come to respect and live you so much. I admire your honest and the real true strength and bravery you have showed simply by keeping on breathing each and every day...whether you wanted to or not. It seems that no matter what happened, you were able to just keep on keeping on, one more breath after the other. Thank you Kathy for the incredible year, you have become an inspiration for me. I had a terrible year about 3 years ago, I have no idea what happened to me and either do the doctors. I had night sweats and burning and white crud every where in my throat, I had vertigo where the room went so fast I could not stop vomiting. I had brain fog so bad that I thought I would have to quit my job (I am a professor and a psychologist and do research and teach at a University). I spent whole days at my desk where I could not accomplish one single task. I totally crashed...I had anxiety so bad that my brain actually HURT.......I am recovered, I don't know why...perhaps the lexapro they gave me to help with the brain fog and anxiety finally worked...perhaps the anti yeast medications they gave me worked...but slowly, I got better and others saw I was before I could see it. One day, I felt new and whole again. I wish and pray the same for you Kathy. I wish I knew what happened to make my biology just get so out of whack...or what happened to make it all better one day. That way I might be able to tell someone the answer if it happens to them....instead I can just tell you that you never know...things can really just get all better and this will all seem like a distant nightmare. Take care, peace and love to you. Kathy

[Saima]

I love you too.